I Don’t Want to be Well But I do Want to be Whole.
Of course I want to be well it’s just that I’d rather be whole, if push comes to shove – and it does.
What is well? It is a life largely enjoyed by the young without physical impediment and free of disease. Equally it isn’t something that lasts for most through the years. What is whole? It is a growing internal health and congruence, space within and self knowledge – that sort of thing. This is available to all regardless of age, although it tends to come with age. Paul tells us in 2 Corinthians 4:16 that, “Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day.”
‘Well’ is well and good, unwell isn’t enviable. ‘Well’ is a laudable goal where what you can do or not do makes a difference, and so we should but it’s not always enough and how will we live if ‘well’ is threatened or alludes us? Our responses can lead us to ‘whole.’
1 Timothy 4:7-8. “Spend your time and energy in training yourself for spiritual fitness. Physical exercise has some value, but spiritual exercise is more important, for it promises reward in both this life and the next.”
‘Well’ is the unashamed paraded in your face goal of this world; ‘whole’ is that of another world, a lasting world – it lasts, that’s the point. Paul was accustomed to weakness but he was profoundly whole. His life was Christ. 2 Corinthians 13:4, “Although he died on the cross in weakness, he now lives by the mighty power of God. We too, are weak, but we live in him and have God’s power.” See also 2 Corinthians 12:8-10 and Galatians 4:13-15 where Paul specifically states he was sick when he first brought the Good News of ‘wholeness’ to the Galatians.
We should do our best to be ‘well’ but we should do everything to be ‘whole’ with emotional strength, richness of character, capacity to triumph in difficulty, with humour in the soul, and tenderness and compassion.
Pain can make us ‘whole’ whereas it’s unlikely that it will make you well – not in the short term at least. My lovely wife Helen was sick with cancer for 5 years; she wasn’t ‘well’ but she was certainly ‘whole,’ remarkably so – more than most who are ‘well,’ untroubled by disease or grief.
We need and should eat well, exercise and live well to be ‘well.”
But we must love, have hope, repent, believe, and sacrifice to be ‘whole.’
I don’t want to be well but I do want to be whole.